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I’ve never had an orgasm

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DearBunmi,

I am a married mother of three and in the 23 years I’ve been married to my husband I’ve never had what you could call an orgasm.

Despite having been sexually active for over half of my life, the sex life with my husband has never been ‘electric’.

I’ve tried to talk to him in the past about this but he gets defensive. He says he finds nothing wrong with our sex life but I know I need to inject spice into our life without upsetting him. Any ideas?

Diana, by e-mail.

Dear Diana,

To have an orgasm you have to let go of your own inhibitions too. If you can’t feel I00 per cent relaxed, it won’t happen. First, you need to get in touch with your doctor to have your hormone levels checked. Next, you indulge in a good vibrator – several newspapers and magazines carry adds on where to get them.

Don’t be ashamed or embarrassed – this is 2017 not 1960!

In the comfort of your bedroom, with no one else around, get familiar with your vibrator and let your imagination take over. Through your vibrator, you will have an orgasm and will now have to show your husband which buttons to press to give you one himself. But first cook him a nice dinner, open a bottle of wine before letting him know you have a surprise for him! Good luck.

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